How do we make peace with our unlived lives?
Have you ever made a decision and wondered how your life would have been if you had made a different choice? We all have. So, how do we make peace with our unlived lives? How do we stop tormenting ourselves and move forward with a calmer and content past?
Talk with the influencers of our young adults selves about the path that you want to take and have the courage to be able to do so. Tell your parents or your peer groups to say that you understand their desires and aspirations for you, but that is not the path that you want to take.
Be flexible with the time frame for your decisions. When you are thinking about all the different things that you want to achieve, make sure that they're fluent so you can tackle them at any point in your life.
Learn to be okay with the decisions that you make. If some of your decisions don't pan out the way that you originally anticipated, learn to accept it.
Take the temperature of your life on a regular consistent basis. So, whether it's your social life, your career path, your health and wellness, your mental well-being, find a way to get those in balance at a regular interval. That way, you can be okay when decisions don’t pan out. Because you will know that that's the best decision that you could have made at that point of time.
And for those decisions that you may feel didn't go potentially great, have a grieving point. Make sure you learn from them, acknowledge that that was the best decision that you could have made at that particular moment in time and then communicate that to people in your closest inner-circle.
Be okay with the concept of changing and the fact that our lives will have a flow and shift, from our childhood through our adolescence, young adults into middle-aged and into our senior years. Be okay with that fluidity that the person that you thought you were going to be is probably not going to be the case. Having the concept of a constant evolution of what your life is going to be like is a way that you can come to terms with the decisions you make and if you come to terms with those decisions, it will be easier to accept the life you didn't live.
Co-creator passion: The foundation started by her family called Carmen's Angel Fund, as well as a strong advocate for organ donation.
Invention of the week: The Feynman Technique, a technique for finding the best way to learn anything. The technique goes like this: you choose a concept or topic and you try to teach it to a young child, from there you find the gaps in your knowledge or the areas in which you were a little bit fumbling over your words and you go back to your source material, but now you know how to approach it and what to learn for a better understanding. This helps the ability to articulate the material as well as the ability to retain the information.